When I talk to my mommy friends or my children’s classmates’ moms, it seems like our discussion often focuses on which activities our children should participate in to stand out. Maybe it’s because we live in the bay area and the ultra competitive environment creates this behavior.
I often worry about whether my children are falling behind because they are not going to Chinese or Japanese school, or playing club soccer or doing gymnastics. Honestly speaking, between piano lessons and swimming, and teaching them Japanese myself, they barely finish all their homework as it is. I do get concerned when I hear from other parents, “so and so’s schools are already teaching their 2nd grade students 3rd grade math,” etc. All that changed a few weeks ago, when something happened that made me take a step back and realize what’s truly important in life.
Our family went to Target to shop for birthday gifts and home items. My husband took the two children to the toy section to buy birthday gifts while I explored the kitchen section. After 15 minutes or so, I went to meet them in the toy section. As predicted, they were busy looking at what they want for Christmas, instead of selecting something for their friend’s birthday. I then split from them in the toy section so we could finish shopping quickly.
I don’t remember exactly how much time passed (perhaps just 3 or 4 minutes). I found what I wanted to buy, and my husband and my daughter found me at the same time. My husband then asked me about our son, “Where is he?” I looked around and said “I don’t know, I thought he was with you!” My husband then calmly said, “Okay, he was just looking at Legos a minute ago and is probably in another aisle. Let’s go look for him.”
Standing on the opposite ends of the aisles, we walked down the entire toys and outdoor sections and our son was nowhere to be found. I started panicking a bit and made eye contact with my husband from across the aisles. We didn’t speak a word but both of us were thinking the same thing. All the horrible scenes from movies where children get kidnapped raced through our minds. I’ve never been so scared in my entire life, screaming in my head “What happened to my baby?”
My husband found a Target worker nearby and told him that our son was missing. The worker asked my husband what our son was wearing. Remembering that he took a few camera phone photos earlier in the store, he showed the picture of our son to the worker. Definitely a bit embarrassing, but more on that later.
The worker, after seeing the photo, said into his headset, “Code yellow, code yellow, there’s an Asian boy wearing a blue shirt with red stripe who is missing.” He then asked us to go wait at guest services. Our hearts sank with every passing second. We quickly walked towards guest services holding onto our daughter’s hand, as she kept asking “Where is he? Where did he go?”
Finally, at guest services, I saw my son waiting there. He burst out crying the moment he saw us as well. I ran towards him and hugged him tighter than I’ve ever hugged him. At that moment, nothing else really mattered except for the fact that I had him safely in my arms again. Now that the incident is over, I realize that it doesn’t really matter if my children do 50 activities, or just a few. I just want them to be healthy and happy, just like what I wished for when they were first born.
When we had dinner with our friends over the weekend and told them the story, we cracked up when we realized which picture my husband had shown the employee who was helping us. Good thing it wasn’t my daughter who went missing! We would have had to show them this super helpful photo.
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[…] Lost and Found […]
Aww Nami,
I am so glad you found your son in the end. It sort of reminds me the fifth joyful mystery as Mary and Joseph left Jesus in the temple. Imagine the horror they went through… In a way, I find it is encouraging to know that the Holy Family went through some similar struggles as we are going through daily as parents.
On a side note, the pictures are AWESOME!
IT’s been almost a year since this incident, but the kids still remember this event! Thank you so much for your kind words. 🙂
Nami, I had the same experience with my son, who was 14 at the time. We were staying on the Gold Coast in Australia at a resort. We signed my son up for an all-day deep-sea fishing trip, since he loves fishing. My husband put him in a taxi with instructions where to be dropped off at the marina. Four hours later, we got a call from the fishing company saying our son had never got on the boat. I was worried sick for four hours- imaging the worst. Thankfully, he turned up later at our hotel- he had ‘accidentally’ got on a bachelor party boat- full of young men (thank God, no strippers). He was sea sick the whole trip, but I was so worried!
Hi Fran! Thank you so much for your kind comment, and I’m very sorry for my late response. I just realized that it is possible that I’d be worried when my kids are much older too after reading your post. You must have been SO scared!!!! It’s funny now that he was actually “experienced” his first bachelor party at the age of 14!!! LOL. I’m so glad he was safe!
Dear Nami, my heart was pounding extremely fast when I was reading your story as I recalled similar experience in Taiwan last year. We went to Taiwan for holidays in a big group, including my parents and my sister and family. We were at the super crowded Taichung Fengjia Night Market. The taxi drivers let us alight along the road as it was too crowded for them to drive nearer to the market. I got off the 7-seater coach first and waited for my kid, but I forgot what I was doing (holding the door or camera) and assumed my mom was holding onto my kid’s hand. When everyone got off the coach, I suddenly and immediately realized that my girl was not there!!! I exclaimed and they all started turning their heads and my mom spotted my girl walking ahead (a few people between her and us!!) on her own!!! All of us shouted her name and ran forward to catch hold of her! She was in shock as she realized she was walking on her own! I still panic now as I write the encounter. I cannot and will not want to imagine what would have happened if we did not spot her in time. After that, I make sure I hold her hand whenever I can. I still shudder thinking about it, nightmare for mommies indeed! Thank God that our kids are found and safe.
Oh no, so scary! I’m so glad to hear you found your daughter. We were lucky that we received the luck or the second chance in cases like this. I certainly don’t want this to happen again! It was a horrifying moment to us but good that each of our family members learned something big and important. Thank you for sharing your story with us. 🙂
Wow, what a scary experience! I am so glad you found your son safe and sound!! I bet he won’t ever wander off again too!
I’m sorry for my late response – I completely missed this comment. Thank you for your kind words. Yes he’s been very careful since the incident. 🙂